In this video, Youtuber Brianne describes her experience with dating a narcissist, and I'm sure many of you (men included) will relate. I most certainly do! Have you ever had a relationship start on cloud 9, only to quickly fall apart and transform into a storm of miscommunication, drama, manipulation and neglect as soon as you try to get a little deeper, beyond the honeymoon artifices?
If so, this video (and the article below it) might help enlighten you as to why this is the case. At the 5 minute mark, Brianne touches on the part we may play into attracting narcissists, which is such an important component to ending the unhealthy pattern and attracting a relationship that is truly aligned with us. You can fast-forward to 1 minutes 40 seconds to get straight to her relationship story. (Scroll down or click HERE to learn how you and your narcissist partner are actually the same.)
How You And Your Narcissist Partner Are The Same. (Massively Eye-Opening)
Blaming narcissists for all of our relationship troubles seems to be a trend these days. But the truth is; if you've attracted one, there is a GOLDEN lesson in there for you. Chances are you both are more similar than you'd think! We actually do attract partners that mirror us, we just have to look past the surface.
Same Core Issue, Different Defence Mechanism.
The Narcissist's Defence Mechanism:
Narcissists generally carry deep abandonment issues of some sort, whether due to a difficult childhood, rejection at school or whatever past event would have triggered a deep sense of isolation, unsafeness and a lack of love. They typically project this wound by making sure they (or you) never get too deep into their true feelings. They do this by closing the lid on their pain and relying on a "safe" yet fragile fantasy world. When it comes to romantic relationships, this fantasy world often relies on romantic idealization, superficiality, lust, flirting sprees, and getting their ego fed by attention and praise – addictions which serve as a replacement for the love they feel starved of.
Hint: If they make you feel like the most beautiful, perfect and amazing prince/princess in the world during the early stages of your relationship but you feel like there is no real depth to the relationship (like you don't even really know them and they don't really know you), that's the...