Study Finds Narcissists Are Bred Not Born, Here Are The 8 Steps To Not Raise One

Avatar Laif Beck | December 14, 2017

A recent study found that narcissism is actually deeply rooted in the way a child is raised, and the way his parents interacted with him as a child.

This study was conducted by the researchers at Ohio State University and the University of Amsterdam and it found that narcissism is more prevalent in kids of parents who overly evaluate their kids, or parents who treat their kids as if they are more special than other children.

Initially, these ideas may not seem like a problem. However, there is a fine line between making children understand their importance and making them feel as if they are better than others.

These findings could prove to be extremely useful since it can help us take steps at an initial level and prevent more narcissists from coming up in the near future.

It is so depressing to understand and accept that the narcissists today are contributing to social problems such as violence and aggression,  and recent studies have also suggested how widespread this problem is.

So how do parents raise narcissists? Well, they tell them that they are wonderful, the best and the most special person in the classroom or in the sports field or even in the country! And they keep telling them that!

Not a good idea right? Here’s a little something to help! Follow these 8 steps to make sure your child doesn’t become a narcissist.

Say no.

It is a widespread belief that telling your child ‘no’ for anything is a buzzkill, and can put a damper on the child’s creativity and self expression. This, however, is not true, and it is absolutely fine to tell your children no when needed. Especially if they’re doing something that shouldn’t be done. Most of us have listened to a lot of no’s in our life and still accomplished a lot by learning to come up with alternative plans.

If a child learns to do this at the young age itself, he won’t be shocked the first time he hears a no!

Teach them basic manners.

One of the basic issues that underlie narcissism is the lack of manners. Make sure you raise your children in a way that they learn how and when to say sorry and apologize when they’ve made a mistake.

Teach them how to manage frustration.

Frustration stems from an individual’s inability to confront failure and learn from it. Teach your child how to overcome adversity and disappointment in life, and do that in a beautiful way. Don’t cocoon your child from anything unpleasant. Infact, let him learn how to handle things.

Be kind.

As a parent, be kind to your child, but also teach him how to be kind to other people. This may seem painfully obvious, but most parents forget to do that and raise narcissists. Notice how the child interacts with those around them. Are they rude and unaffected by other people’s feelings and emotions? Teach them empathy. At the very beginning, teach your child that not just them, but everyone else matters too!

Travel with them.

Take your child to another country or state or even to a nearby town. Travel with them and give them a change of scenery. This will help them understand how different people have a different style or way of living, and that everyone out there is important and special. This will also help him come out of his own self-centered bubble if it exists.

Love and approval are different.

Love your kids unconditionally no doubt, but make sure you don’t translate that love into a constant approval of everything they do and a constant praise for them. It is okay to be disappointed with them when they do something wrong and still love them with all your heart.

Read to them.

A recent study has revealed that reading fiction can help improve empathy in children, because it places them in the shoes of others and helps them understand their feelings too. So make it a point to read to your children too.

Run errands with them.

There’s nothing better than reinforcing the simplicity of life in children by getting them to run errands. It can help keep them grounded, which is an extremely powerful lesson. Let them spend a portion of their time doing everyday things- things that are necessary and that everyone around them does. This can also prove to be a happy bonding time for you with your kiddo!


Written by Laif Beck


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Study Finds Narcissists Are Bred Not Born, Here Are The 8 Steps To Not Raise One