There are many reasons why women are immensely powerful in their own rite, and highly capable of creating change regardless of societal limitations...
AND we also have an extra advantage.
We are the Mothers, girlfriends, sisters and friends- of our men.
There's something about women, that make men want to become better men.
Why do men do what they do? Men have an innate and instinctual desire to serve Women. Men are wired with the primal drive to protect, feed and build structures... for women. Although we may not be living in tribal communities where the men hunt and build while the women weave and watch the children, men still love to protect, provide, and please. Nothing makes a man happier than seeing a Woman glow in enjoyment, especially if he had something to do with it.
Ever notice your guy friend making a ton of changes when he starts dating someone new? He finally cuts hair, stops drinking, and starts eating healthier. Men are wired to want to make women happy.
In Beyonce's song Run The World, she emphasizes the persuasive power of Women, and she's got a valid point. You can’t help but want to give an amazing and deserving woman what she wants and more.
Women get their way, and because of this we hold twice the power of our gender alone. In this way, women are not just housewives, but major influencers of societal evolution.
Women call men to a greater standard, and men enjoy rising to the occasion.
So... what do we want from our men, and better yet, what are we requiring? This is a great question to ask in regards to our individual relationships as well as our collective. Are we claiming what we really want and deserve as a gender?
The time has come to take personal responsibility for how we are showing up in the world, and what we deserve as a collective.
On a personal level, are we encouraging and expecting our men to exercise emotional intelligence and conscious communication? Are we speaking our intuition and asking that our feminine wisdom be heard and respected? Are we asking our brothers, fathers, and partners to honor our needs, boundaries, self care, and our bodies? Are we demanding our sovereignty and freedom to expand and pursue our dreams as well? Are we demanding that they be self reflective and take personal responsibility for their actions? Are we asking that they be mindful of how their businesses treat the earth and their employees? Are we demanding equal leadership? Are we demanding support for female entrepreneurs? Nourishing judicial and educational systems?
ARE WE CLAIMING OUR BIRTHRIGHT AS EQUAL CITIZENS TO CREATE THE WORLD WE WISH TO SEE?
It’s a well known fact that women mature faster than men, and it is possible to utilize this difference as an opportunity for the collective advancement of gender expectations. A patriarchal society has been running this world straight into the ground, and women know there’s a better way. We know that no one should starve, that war isn't necessary, and that everyone deserves a home, clean food and water. We know all women and girls should be honored and not taken advantage of. We know we are destroying the earth, mistreating animals and contributing to their extinction. We know love is more important than competition.
Have you heard of a sex strike?
One way Women have leveraged Men's values to make change throughout history, is...
Yes. And its quite effective. Here are some examples;
- Women in the African country of Togo took advantage of their womanly powers to withhold sex in order to get men to take action action against their dictator and bring democratic change. See the article here; http://www.cnn.com/2012/08/29/opinion/ghitis-sex-strikes/
- Fed up with nearly four decades of violence and rebellion, in 2011, Philippine women launched a "crossed legs strike" to demand construction of a road. Due to fighting in the villages, the local road to the main market was not safe for the women to travel and transport their goods. They refused to make love, until the men managed to get a road built, so it wouldn't take 10 hours to reach the provincial capital, 35 miles away. Moved by the Men's suffering, the government agreed to build the road.
- In the embattled city of Pereira, Colombia, the wives and girlfriends of gang members vowed they would keep their legs crossed unless the men stopped the violence that had killed nearly 500 people. The murder rate reportedly dropped by 26.5%.
- In 2003, the Liberian people had endured 14 years of a brutal war that had torn the country apart. The leaders of the Women of Liberia Mass Action for Peace organized a series of nonviolent actions, including a sex strike, demanding an end to the war. Before the year was over, the parties signed a peace deal ending the war and laying the groundwork for democratic elections.
- In the United States, 2012 When the contraception mandate was under attack, a group of women decided to take matters into their own hands (and force their husbands to do the same). They organized a sex strike to "help people understand that contraception is for women and men, because men enjoy the benefit of women making their own choices," See article here, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/03/13/sex-strike-contraception-_n_1342266.html
Clearly something is incredibly imbalanced if women have to resort to withholding sex to make a substantial change.
In a society where women are taught that our sexuality is our worth, it's an interesting concept to utilize this asset for a greater purpose. It’s a crazy thought, but imagine what would happen if every woman in the world decided to withhold sex from their lovers until there was a female president? Or until we had time off during our menstrual cycles? If moms stopped cooking and doing their sons laundry until there was healthy food in schools and hospitals? Or until violence against women stopped.
Once women hold real political power, they no longer need to resort to sex strikes and other indirect means to express their views and achieve results.
Until then, what assets can we leverage to make positive change in our lives and in the world? What are the highest values we would like our men to serve?
We get what we claim in life, and it’s time women claim more.
How about we up the ante a bit and see what happens.
If our men are not helping us to co-create a life and a world that works for everyone it's time we claim more.
Whether its starting a community dialogue, encouraging your man to read a book on conscious communication, or encouraging him to join a Men's group, we have the right to expect more. If your lover isn't showing up with his heart and soul, show him another way or show him the door. If your friend makes a degrading comment about women, call him out. If your husbands company is investing in corporate greed over positive social change, suggest an alternative. If your Father is a political leader, encourage equal rights, funding for arts and education, and strategies for ending hunger, war and homelessness.
We deserve more. It all comes down to personal responsibility. What are we claiming and what are we allowing in the world and in our personal lives... and is it working for us?
Much Love, Empowerment, and Boundlessness.