What It Takes to Love Someone Who Has Been Through Hell and Back
Rough patches are a natural part of life, and we all muddle through them as best we can. For sensitive people, however, this is especially difficult, as bad experiences can easily turn into depression or an emotional funk.
As a result, sensitive individuals sometimes experience tremendous difficulty in finding love. Because of those still raw places, they may need someone who can show them more patience, tenderness, and kind strength.
Being with a sensitive person can be difficult, too, because they are more emotional, often in ways you may not at first understand. What they need most, though, is for you to be there, unconditionally—often times, the fear of being as hurt as badly as they were previously may be an explanation for what you see as unpredictable behavior.
Consider the following seven tips as you navigate a relationship with a sensitive person:
1) They may be afraid of being hurt again. The only cure is time and love.
Sensitive people may not readily show their weakness, nor may they be willing to admit their insecurities, at least not until they know they can trust you wholeheartedly—and building that trust takes time. So give them time and your patience.
2) When they need space, let them have it. Just make sure they know you’ll be there, too.
Because they may be vulnerable and afraid of being hurt again, they are likely to sometimes pull away when things are going well. When they need that space, don’t fight it—let them have the space they’re asking for, and be ready to comfort them when they come back and need a listening ear.
3). Be there when they need comforting
Especially if that fear may seem ridiculous to you. Sensitive people are used to not being heard, or worse, being ridiculed for their fears. Don’t make that mistake. Instead, be there for them—because even if you don’t share their fears, that doesn’t make them less real to a sensitive person.
4) They may feel inadequate
That’s because they’re not used to being heard or loved for who they are. Again, you need to be patient with them, and eventually they’ll come to understand that you really do love them for who they are.
5) They may try to self-sabotage
This is especially true if some of those scars haven’t healed. As a result, they expect you to let them down and hurt them, and so they may do something to sabotage the relationship. If they break it first, you can’t hurt them. Make an effort to be there for them, hear them, and love them, while also giving them space as they need it. It’s a rough road, but can be very worth it.
6) They may need control
Because they didn’t like feeling powerless in other situations where they ended up hurt, they may try to seize control of situations with you. This is something you’ll need to negotiate gently together.
7) Remember you chose each other
Building a relationship together can be difficult. Ultimately, it’s important that you both remember that you chose each other for a multitude of reasons, and that can help you work together through the rough patches.
This article was inspired by an amazing one here
Written by Matt S.