You know how some people just always seem to have life going their way? Who seem to always get the things they want out of life?
They might be attractive, but more than that, they have charisma: Rooms light up watching them.
According to Dr Travis Bradberry, author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0, there are a few characteristics that help set these people apart, and make them appear both more friendly and more charismatic, which in turn helps them get the things they want.
Bradberry notes that “When influential people speak, conversations spread like ripples in a pond. And those ripples are multidirectional; influencers inspire everyone around them to explore new ideas and think differently about their work.”
In other words? These extremely likable people are in part so likable because they’re aware of how they interact with others. As a result, they don’t act as if they’re better than you. Instead, they make you feel as if you can be just as successful.
In particular, there are thirteen things that make these irresistible people stand out:
They treat everyone with equal respect and dignity.
They refuse to put other people down, as they recognize we’re all human, and as such, are worthy of our dignity.
They refuse to gossip.
Because these people are always trying to be their best, as well as help others be their best, they have no need to talk poorly of others.
They treat you as they’d like to be treated.
This goes back to dignity and respect. And they go a step beyond, by making sure you’re treated the way you’d like to be treated.
They maintain boundaries.
While these people are always trying to make the people around them better, and are full of kindness, dignity, and respect, they also appreciate that you can only do so much. As such, they keep boundaries for themselves, so that they don’t wear themselves into the ground.
They are authentic and genuine.
These irresistible people own who they are, and they’re confident in themselves. They’re genuinely warm individuals, but they won’t pretend to care about things that aren’t important to them, or bend to others’ will when it runs contrary to who they are.
They have upstanding character and integrity.
There aren’t many people who are comfortable standing apart in what they believe, but these people do: They know what is important to them, and they stand behind it. They will not cut corners, even if doing so makes their life more difficult.
Their empathy and compassion are unrivaled.
Most people are only so willing to step outside themselves to empathize with someone else. Not so with these people, who are always willing to love and show compassion.
Their lives are full of love.
And they love their lives. They know that taking risks and loving can result in heart break, but they would rather have their heart broken than not live a life full of love. As a result, they’re able to make the people around them feel like they are the center of their world.
They unify and connect people.
They help people discover connections with other people they might otherwise never socialize with, and they can help you meet the people you need to meet to keep growing as an individual. They can also help bring disparate groups to consensus as a result of their ability to help unify people.
They love freely.
They love to be around others, and they give of themselves to everyone that is around them.
They value work.
Part of their charm is that they don’t look for shortcuts, but rather put themselves fully into their goals. They succeed as a result of their hard work, not because of their charm…which in turn only makes them more charming.
They’re always willing to listen.
As Dr. Bradberry notes, “People like to know you’re listening, and something as simple as a clarification question shows not only that you are listening but that you also care about what they’re saying. You’ll be surprised how much respect and appreciation you gain just by asking good questions.”
As a result, you feel truly understood with these people. They know you, because they truly hear you and care about what you have to say. As a result, you feel loved.
They’re not afraid to be grateful.
Part of the reason these people get ahead is that they’re not afraid to ask for things, and they’re certainly skilled at expressing their gratitude whenever someone helps them. They know the true magic of expressing gratitude, and how many doors saying “thank you” can help open.
These are the people who can help make you a better you. And the thirteen traits above are a big part of the reason why.
*This content was inspired by an amazing article that can be found here.