“With every true friendship, we build more firmly the foundations on which the peace of the world rests” – Mahatma Gandhi
In life we eventually realize that the people we surround ourselves with are essential components to the flow in which we live. So how do we find and sustain those relationships that feed our soul? Here’s our view on five essential ways in which you can feel if a friendship is in alignment with your highest good.
1. Do they speak with actions?
While anyone can send you a text saying they “love you”, a true friend will go above and beyond to show you. How many times have you trusted someone to be there only to be let down because your expectations were not met in a current situation? Though it is wise to be free of expectations so you may be free of disappointment and open to the ever-unfolding reality, it is important to be aware of a person’s ability to act with integrity.
If someone honors and appreciates you, they will prove it to you by investing their time into things you really care about. In friendships, this most importantly includes following through on promises made. Honesty, integrity and trust rely on actions that follow in alignment.
2. Do they really listen to you?
How interesting is it that when someone is fully present and you are able to feel it with every ounce of your being? You feel their patience as they listen and respond with kindness, relaying empathy and often providing genuine feedback or thought provoking questions that lead to higher truths reached. You are able to release and they can receive, acting as a sounding board and hopefully providing a safe place for you free of judgment.
A sense of acknowledgment comes over you because you are truly being heard. This person’s mindful response can mean everything in one moment, providing understanding and perhaps healing. A flow of this kind creates the basis of lasting friendship unique in form to each relationship.
3. Do they keep it real all the time, even when it hurts?
Many times we see people surround themselves with friends who simply tell them whatever they want to hear. While this may suit someone in the moment, it is superficial and serves the ego which eventually leads to issues. A genuine friend provides you with real perspective that you may not find anywhere else and that honesty may not always be the easiest to swallow.
As we grow, we learn to appreciate these people because we see how their honesty leads us to some of our most treasured moments of understanding. We suddenly see all the floating half truths fed to us by many and how powerful it can be when we face what truly is. A newfound trust in ourselves and others is developed through these relationships and we understand more fully what unconditional love is all about.
4. Do they understand that forgiveness is key?
Conscious relationships rely on finding understanding and acting with compassion. When misunderstanding arises, people tend to react in fear and place blame however growth comes from our ability to forgive and receive the blessings that follow. Mature people are able to calmly discuss their issues, and respect one another’s feelings, while making sure to sit present in empathy for one another. By taking the time to simply see where the other person is coming from, we take a giant step in resolution even if we may not fully agree with where he or she is coming from.
Forgiveness for whatever misunderstanding may have occurred then frees us of negative energy attached to the situation. This does not mean we “forgive and forget” but instead we acknowledge, reflect and choose to move forward together. Everyone makes mistakes but it is in how we recover from these misunderstandings that determines whether a true friendship is indeed underway.
5. Do they remind you of your greatness?
It is said that giving up is the only sure way to fail. When you feel down, real friends will never focus on your weaknesses as if they are always perfect. Real friends remind you of your greatness by speaking to the realness of life and your unique qualities. They believe in you and will often surprise you with their supportive viewpoints on how special you are.
They can see when you are losing sight of yourself and are able to bring you back to a beautiful reality in which you are your best. These people are essential because they assist you in staying grounded while simultaneously providing love that you otherwise may not be showing yourself in the moment.
“Understanding how to be and know a true friend is essential in this world.” – SoulSpot
Learning to share your energy with others is an important process and it is important to pass along this wisdom with others so we may all take part in healthier relationships. We look forward to you spreading the knowledge and please share other ways you consider true friends to act in the comments below.