How Mentally Strong People Respond To Passive Aggressive Bullsh*t

A slightly witty or sarcastic comment from a friend may be okay to deal with every once in a while, but when it comes to a passive aggressive remark that has possibly concealed sinister intentions, handling things can get a tad bit more difficult.

A lot of times, some snarky comment such as “You look good for someone your age” or something like “You would do better with your career if you did so and so and knew your job better,” especially by someone who know can be tough to handle. It may seem like the world is getting snarkier all the time, and you may be getting these backhanded comments a lot often than you’d like and having those jabs every now and then can really stress you out.

Why It’s Important to Stay Strong

A study conducted by Michigan State University in 2016 found out that incivility actually spreads, and people who were a victim of such snarky comments and behavior and those who were subjected to these regular put-downs and sarcasm actually wasted their mental energy to a good extent in the hopes of interprets the individual’s intentions behind those comments.

They also tend to get fatigued and have a lot of trouble managing their own impulses and find it tough to regulate their emotions. They are therefore, more likely to lash out because they lack the energy to control their impatience.

It has also been found that one snarky comment can actually lead to mass incivility. Thankfully, it is also possible to stay strong mentally even when dealing with such individuals who pass snarky comments. Here are a few tips to keep your calm in such a scenario.

  1. Don’t Give Away Your Power

If you allow the way others behave with you to have a control over your thoughts and feelings, you are ultimately giving them power over you. Don’t allow those negative and snarky comments to influence how you actually feel about yourself.

This attitude can be exceptionally helpful if you’re dealing with such individuals on a daily basis, and mentally deciding that you are not going to allow that person’s comments to ruin your day or take up room in your life can be extremely helpful. Think of that person as a sort of a ‘supervisor’ and decide that your ‘supervisor’s’ comments and remarks do not have an influence on your self worth.

Try to walk away from the situation if you feel that can help, and practice taking slow deep breaths to stay calm when you’re with that particular individual.

  1. Stay True to Your Values

Practice being mentally mentally strong. People who are mentally strong know their values and make it their priority over everything else, which can be particularly helpful when you’re dealing with people who are snarky.

Make sure you maintain your integrity at all costs and let go of anything that isn’t in line with your inner beliefs. Excuse yourself from such situations and keep telling yourself it is important to treat others with respect. This will bring you inner peace. No matter what, don’t attempt to stoop down to that person’s level- just hold your head up high and be proud of the fact that you were actually able to be the bigger person.

  1. Know When to Speak Up and When to Shut Up.

Knowing exactly when you need to be assertive and when you need to speak up is important and a key factor that most mentally strong people have. They know exactly when to ignore someone who makes a snarky comment just to get attention, and exactly when to speak up and ask them to shut up.

You don’t always have to get the last word in such a situation- just weigh your options and don’t jump into an argument just for the sake of it, but also don’t be afraid of calling someone out for their behavior. Use direct communication whenever possible. Ask the person who behaved inappropriately- “I noticed you just did that. Is there a problem?”
This can help tackle the issue if any, and if the person is genuinely bothered by everything you do, they’ll get a hint that they need to back down.

  1. Build Your Mental Muscle

Building mental muscle is something anyone can do, and should definitely do, since it can help you handle tough circumstances and people who are hard to deal with in a better way. If you find yourself in a toxic environment or are a part of an unhealthy workplace, take steps to improve your mental health.


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